Some questions to ponder...

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of Progress?

Why do they call it Military Intelligence?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

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P.S. Okay, I realize that yesterday's joke wasn't really at all that funny, I was just short on ideas, so I thought I might use a very old joke. Sorry if I disappointed you.